Damaged child of today is the broken adult of tomorrow
Sir Frank Peters :
Corporal punishment isn’t new. It shares birthday celebrations with the weather. Deploringly, corporal punishment has been taunting and punishing good God-loving, God-fearing young people – the future of all nations – for centuries. Very few have escaped its demonic evil wrath and destruction.
There is no doubt there is evil percolating among us and Irish statesman Edmund Burke (1729-1797) once remarked: “The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing”.
Our loving parents’ parents, their parents, and their parents before them are likely to have been both subjects and purveyors of the corporal punishment evil, but they, in their ignorance, didn’t classify it as evil. They liberally coated and camouflaged it with kind words of love, affection, and erroneously described it as discipline.
It may seem wrong and unkind of me to describe them as fools, but those who perform foolish acts are usually fools, even if they are the people whom we love, which does not disqualify them from the description.
Sadly, they’ve passed the foolishness down the family tree without giving it attention or readdress and because the action was deemed ‘natural’, ‘normal’, ‘cultural’ or ‘the thing to do’. As a result, many innocent and beautiful lives have been damaged or completely ruined because of this unadulterated ignorance and cruelty and this has to stop.
The most appalling sight in the world to witness is ignorance in action and it doesn’t get any more ignorant than corporal punishment. Not only is it senseless, but totally ineffective, as a mountain of evidence will testify.
Fearful children become fearful adults, who find it difficult to trust anyone. The damaged child of today is the broken adult of tomorrow and an immeasurable loss to society.
Any kind of corporal punishment, however seemingly small, puts children’s integrity and dignity at risk. Why take the unnecessary chance with those whom you (allegedly) love or position them in a school or madrassa where it’s likely to happen to them? It’s immoral, cruel, unjust, unacceptable, and just doesn’t make sense. And knowing the possibilities of such danger, it’s most definitely not an act of love.
Corporal punishment infers and psychologically underscores in a bold red line that violence is power and a way, if not the only way, to solve problems. It damages children’s self-esteem producing depression, anxiety, and can lead to cancer… yes, cancer… the evidence exists.
Who is to blame? Most certainly, not the child! Children mimic what they see adults do.
Parents and alleged ‘teachers’ use corporal punishment as a convenient means of addressing social situations, minor misbehaviour, non compliance with rules, because of a lack of skill in addressing the situation; or the failure to control their own emotions.
It’s their lack of skill and ignorance that exacerbates the situation, not that of the child. The child is awakening, developing, exploring and trying to discover the parameters of his/her boundaries. He/she requires discipline, not punishment. Discipline is always served best with a generous helping of understanding and compassion.
Famous son Rabindranath Tagore (1861-1941) who abhorred corporal punishment, said: “Discipline means to teach, not to punish”.
The child may feign respect to avoid getting another thrashing, but any love and respect that may have existed between them prior is lost. Anyone slapped in the face is unlikely to forget the sordid incident in ten life-times. And NOBODY (in their right mind) respects those who slapped him or her in the face.
(Sir Frank Peters is a former newspaper and magazine publisher and editor; an award-winning writer, royal goodwill ambassador, humanitarian, human rights activist and an Honorary Member of the Bangladesh Freedom Fighters.)
